dawn in layers

i have to write now, halfway through dawn and the singing roomie. half-way through exams and 4 hours from the morning alarm, the price for a prime studying spot, though the quality of studying can barely match the table's premium.

tonight.

an unfamiliar departure with heavy hearts. so helpless we are sometimes, fragile.

i like to think that i think about life a great deal. but in the midst of thinking i let life slip. i do the thoughts but failed to live the life. in another phase of the now familiar cycle, i seemed to have drifted once more. soon i will rein myself in and continue, in what, i'm not so sure.

I searched deep within and came up empty; will it be a cause of regret in years to come, i do not know. can i still look into your eyes and say i've tried?

in my pursue of nothingness, i have let go much, perhaps unwittingly, sometimes in tandem. too many things in life are transitory. i wish they hang around longer, to ease the nostalgia and the sentimental in me. when we look back with fondness, too late, is often the word. to the friends and deeds that i have neglected, i am sorry.

I do not like to stick a time and date to my mind. Time is what have already passed, not the future that we look to. date and time are fictitious, transitory. in the process of remembering and adhering fastidiously to date and time, have we overshadowed the reason behind said time? Have we missed the moment?

now that i have stated a reason, let's have the occasion. a sincere thank you to those who cared and remembered and those who will remember. and deepest apologies for those whom i have forgotten.

today, my phone also dropped dead. now i hear the voices but not read the words.

is there a point to these words, other than to satisfy my whimsical mood?

don't ask me. he do not know.